Silence

A few weeks ago I recieved the "Silence Issue" of Ode Magazine.  Ever since, I have been paying more attention to silence...or rather, the lack therof. 

I listen for silence and all I hear is more more more noise.  And this acute awareness seems to be raising my sensitivity to the sounds around me almost to an unbearable level.

My world is cacophonic.

I have no air conditioning in my car, so in these 100 degree temperatures, I must keep the windows rolled down.  The road noise is deafening.  Passing vehicles strain my eardrums unbearably.  In a vain effort to cancel out the noise, the radio is blaring at excruciating decibles, covering noise with noise.

I am dog sitting for a friend on vacation.  I am accustomed to large, calm dogs who rarely bark.  I am dog sitting a Schnauzer who barks shrilly at the water dripping in the sink, at cars driving past, at the tv, at my shoelaces if they move funny.  He barks at me and jumps up, doing backflips.  It's funny....but the noise, oh, the noise!!

I work in cubicle land.  Clickety-clack, type type type, click, click, beep, ring, ring...and an indescribable low-level buzzing hum from the fluorescent lights and possible from the server room.  Conversations better saved for conference rooms are held in open hallways.  My cube neighbor (who, incidentally, has an annoying ring tone) arguing with his wife four times daily.  The cell phones, the Blackberries, the alert monitors, beep, beep all day long!  I put in my headphones but that's only more covering noise with noise.

I go home.  I shut the door.  I close the blinds.  Tick-tock (clocks), buzz-buzz (fridge), whoosh-honk-honk (traffic), stomp-stomp (neighbors walking around), aieeeee-splash (kids jumping in the pool).

The world is cacophonic.  It's impossible to find five minutes of complete silence anywhere.  Even in the most remote location, the sounds of nature can be deafening.  According to one of the Ode articles, even in an anechoic chamber, you can still hear the sounds of your own pulse and breathing.  There's no such thing as true silence.

This acute awareness is starting to stress me out. 

My attempts to cancel out noise with noise may possibly be causing hearing loss.  Do you know how loud headphones have to be to drown out the sound of two co-workers in a heated conversation? 

That's no solution.  At this rate, I won't be able to hear birds by the time I'm 40.  And the headaches, oh the headaches! 

Gaah, I am twitching! 

I seem to have a much higher tolerance for naturally made sounds as opposed to mechanized ones.  They're much more soothing. 

Except the Schnauzer.  But he can be dealt with.  I've figured out that if I pet him and quietly say, "Shhhh" and "That's okay, there now", he becomes quiet as a mouse.

I haven't figured out the magic words to stop the co-workers.  I'd try to pet them and say, "There, there..." except that might be misconstrued.  :)  

And that still leaves the clicking and the traffic and...and...and...

The world is cacophonic.  :)